But the truth is, I will leave you- These
have been my wild days, and it´s been a mad existence. But I´ve kept my
promise, now keep your distance. Ha! Sorta kidding. But it's rather confounding
that I´m officially writing my last blog from this country. Well, I guess like
Justin Bieber, I should never say never, or the world "last," for that matter.
But I´m just assumin´...
Anyway, I will do a best for this week´s
entry, cuz, well, that´s the best way to do it on a time-crunch budget.
Best of Tourism- I got to see the castle
built for Trujillo, the famous dictator of this country from 1931-1961. He was a
pretty disgusting human being. But his house was cool. Of course, he didn´t
think so, so the guy that designed it for him had to flee to Canada to avoid
execution. Canada or death? Ha! Kidding again. But seriously, it was a neat
little trip, even though it sits on top of a very large hill and was quite the
hike to reach, and even though after Trujillo rejected the house, it was turned
into a torture chamber for all that opposed the dictatorship. Jeez. I think the
coolest feature about the place though, is its design. Trujillo liked boats so
it was actually built to be shaped like one. As SNL´s Andy Samberg would say,
"I´M ON A BOAT!"
Best of Boches (scoldings)- We were at
the house of the family Geronimo-Reyes, and their son was being a little rowdy
during the lesson. So the father sends the son to his room and then calls him
back. "Do you believe in Jesus?" he asked him. "Do you believe he has all power?
Then you sit down and listen to these girls talk about the Word, or he will come
in the night and give you nightmares." Hna. Bryant and I were, well speechless,
either because what he said was so funny or because it was the first time we´ve
really seen a good ol´ fashioned dose of discipline. Either way it was
fantastic. I hope the kid slept ok that night.
Best of disappointments- I am, however, a
bit disillusioned by the lack of promises kept by, well, everyone. People always
say they´ll be home, come to church, play George Michael music, and then it
never happens. Ok, a little bit of explanation on that last one. Essentially, we
live above a colmado, much like we did in Azua. And all colmados play music; I´m
pretty sure it´s the law. But if we´re gonna be forced to listen to music, well,
then, at least we should have some say in it. So Hna. Bryant asked the colmado
owner if he had any English music. He mentioned the names of Michael Jackson and
George Michael. I don´t know why the latter option sounded so appealing, but it
did. "Yeah, George it up," we responded enthusiastically. "Alright, I´ll play it
soon," he promised. Nope. Nothing. A couple days later, we asked him, "so
whatever happened to ol´ George?"
"This guy playing right now is George,"
he told us, pointing to his computer screen. "No," I told him, "I wasn´t born
yesterday. That´s Zacharias Ferreras." So he could only give the smirk of the
embarrassed and condemned. He kept telling us from that moment forth that he
would play some George Michael. Never happened. One day, while buying from him,
we complained how you just can´t trust in anyone these days. "You can trust in
me," he assured us. "Um, I´m pretty sure you´ve lied to us about 7 times about
putting on the music our hero and personal friend George Michael. You are off the trust
list." Sometimes, if you want something done right, you´ve gotta play "Careless
Whisper" yourself. Someday, when I have access to such things...
Best of Last Minute Plans- It seems like
this Saturday, Quelito will be getting baptized. I hope all the details work
out, but I don´t want to get my hopes up. It´s been a few months in the making,
so this Saturday (my last), seems like as good a day as any.
Best of English Class- To celebrate the
end of the transfer, we celebrated in style with a party, of course. Hna. Bryant
dressed up by putting her Johnny Depp "Pirates of the Caribbean" blanket over
her head, and I borrowed her crazy red, prom-dress looking thing she had made
here, and went as a very scary Marilyn Monroe. And we taught about how to accept
being yelled at by angry Americans over the phone with tolerance and grace. And
then we ate crackers, sodas and tiny cupcakes. What more could you ask
for?
Best of the Best- Getting to visit my old
areas. I went to LA YUCA, and it was pretty much everything I could have hoped
for. All the boys I used to teach have at least doubled in size. And the female
members I went to visit gasped and got all giddy. And people remembered my name!
Are these shallow things to care about? Absolutely! But I was happy to see them,
and they seemed happy to see me. In some ways, it doesn´t seem like over a year
since I´ve been there. Except for the fact that a lot of people have moved and
the ward is so big, it´s about to divide in two, and some of the stores I used
to visit have closed down, and the house I used to live in has Elders in it
now... everything changes. But some things don´t, or I guess, the things that
seem to matter. Seeing that you´ve even made a small difference in someone´s
life is pretty much enough to erase all the hellfire you experience. 
I also visited Quisqueya, but I´ve been
gone a whole 5 weeks, so I´m pretty sure the Calle Defillo is still the Calle
Defillo and the crazies are still crazies. As long as they don´t close my
favorite bakery, I won´t have to make any heads roll. And actually, as I had to
witness so many people end and die in Quisqueya, now it´s someone´s turn to
watch me. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! There is justice in the world.
Well, who knows what my next tale will
tell? Stay tuned for when the name tag comes off and the carriage turns back
into a pumpkin. It´s gonna be one. big. surprise. And fin. Hna. Sweeney
out.
Nostalgically yours, (for the last
time)
Hna. Sweeney "The Fearless" (except on
Sundays)
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